The Power of a Good Question

Expert DOjO’s Head Honcho Brian Mac Mahon invited Ryan Foland and me to speak for a full morning session at the Digital Hollywood Conference in Los Angeles last week.  What an amazing event!  Brian provided the kind of insights that only someone whose lived in 30 countries and has consulted and started companies the world over can provide.   Ryan, a gifted presenter in his own right, delivered a masterclass in communication for entrepreneurs.  I reinforced the value of coming together for conferences and the need for extending that experience through participation in peer advisory/mastermind groups.  During the final 45 minutes, we actually set up a spontaneous mastermind group comprised initially of about 10 volunteers, and soon after we got underway, everyone joined in the experience.

As I reflect on the 2 1/2 hours we spent with this impressive group of entrepreneurs, it’s apparent that the most powerful moments of the entire session were found not in the answers that were given, but in the questions that were raised.  Answers tend to guide us to a conclusion, while questions promote additional learning and further discovery.  The audience asked Brian some very pointed questions – questions which often got to the heart of what was burning inside everyone in the room.

Ryan offered a version of the $64,000 question back to the audience when he asked them to identify the problems their companies are trying to solve.  Not “What do they do?” or “How do they do it?  Ryan asks the bigger question because until you know “precisely” what problem you’re trying to solve, you’re going to have a difficult time communicating the relevance of what you do and surviving as a company.  Ryan’s 3-1-3 pitch coaching model, which helps you get to the heart of that very question, should be part of every entrepreneur’s toolkit.

As for my role, after setting the stage for the value of mastermind groups and why they work so well, we invited people to come up on stage and give it a try – to participate in a real-time experience where one of the members would ask the group for assistance in addressing her most pressing challenge.  This is where the rubber meets the road when it comes to asking the right question.   By taking a few moments to assist the member with crafting the question as accurately as we could determine in that moment, it prevents the group (most of the time) from eventually giving the member some great ideas that turn out to have no real utility – which wouldn’t be much help at all.  After helping the member frame the question, it was time for the group members to start asking questions of their own in an effort to gain a greater understanding of the situation.  Here, we established just three rules for asking questions of the member seeking assistance:

  1. Ask open-ended questions (ones that cannot be answered yes or no).
  2. Do not ask “why” questions (in trying to create a safe environment for sharing, “why” questions can tend to put a group member needlessly on the defensive).
  3. Do not frame a question as a question-mendation (meaning ask questions that improve your understanding what’s going on, not “Have you considered trying x, y, z?”).

Everyone jumped right in and followed my three rules to the letter.  Best of all, the richness of the exchange, along with the ideas that came from the participants after the initial question session was completed, demonstrated to everyone that even in 45 minutes, among a group of people many of whom only met that morning, they could deliver and receive real value.

I’d like to think that on the way out of the room, the audience members were asking themselves this question:  How is it that I’m not in a mastermind group of my own?  Let’s hope so.

 

Don't Stay in Airplane Mode

Perry Maughmer, a Vistage Chair in the Columbus, Ohio area recently shared that he was reading The Power of the Other: The Startling Effect Other People Have On You From the Boardroom to the Bedroom and Beyond – and What to Do About It, by Dr. Henry Cloud.  When smart people tell me they’re reading a really insightful book, I’ve learned over the years that it’s a good idea to buy it right way and start reading it while it’s fresh on my mind.  I’m really glad I did.

Two points that struck me early in Dr. Cloud’s book are 1) “…the neglected truth is that the invisible attributes of relationship and the connection between people have real and tangible power” and that “it begins at birth.”  I often speak to audiences about how early it starts, but only as it relates to childhood memories of wanting to “belong.” It’s my way of helping people reflect on how peer influence has been part of all of our lives for as long as we can remember.  Dr. Cloud speaks to it as a biological and physiological imperative.  This explains a great deal about why our need for human connection is so visceral.

2) Our smart phones serve as a fitting metaphor for maximizing human potential. When your phone is in airplane mode, for example, it has limited functionality.  Connect it to a cellular or wi-fi network, and it transforms into a device with exponential potential.  We are capable of a great deal as individuals, yet we can realize so much more when connected to a network – a network of people who will cheer us on, share their perspectives and wisdom, and hold us accountable for achieving our own self-expressed goals.

In today’s fast-paced, complex world, there’s no need to go it alone.  No need to fight biology and stay in airplane mode.  Challenge yourself to engage in meaningful exchanges with others and take your life (personally and professionally) to new heights.

Image: Chinavasion

All New For 2017

In preparation for the new year, I’m working with Randy Cantrell out of Dallas/Ft.Worth, Texas to create a professionally produced podcast series titled The Year of the Peer, with Leo Bottary.  The series will begin on Thursday, January 12th and post on the second and fourth Thursday of every month.

My guests will be top leaders, authors, journalists and scholars from all walks of life.  We’ll talk about a universally accepted truth with myriad dimensions – who you surround yourself with matters.  This is especially noteworthy in a world where trust in our institutions is low, and where the complexity and blistering pace of change are affecting everyone.  Leaders today are challenged more than ever to prepare for a future most of us can barely imagine.

There’s simply never been a time where understanding and experiencing true peer advantage has ever been more essential.  We’ll have conversations about leadership, accountability, vulnerability, and collaboration, among other things, that you just won’t get anywhere else.  If you’re a leader at any level, or you want to be one someday, this show is for you!

In the next few weeks, I’ll release the names of our guests for the first quarter of the year – some of whom played a critical role in the development of The Power of Peers: How the Company You Keep Drives Leadership, Growth & Success  – as well as other voices who will join us for what promises to be an even larger conversation.  You won’t want to miss it, so keep checking back for details about how you can subscribe.

How's This For Optimizing?

In The Power of Peers: How the Company You Keep Drives Leadership Growth & Success, we outline four ways we typically engage others.  We connect, network, optimize and accelerate.  We defined optimize in terms of what happens when peers work together toward a common goal – when they chase perfection in the pursuit of excellence.  During my recent trip to Washington, DC and the National Gallery of Art, I never thought I’d discover one of the most remarkable examples of optimizing I could have ever imagined.

The sculpture pictured above is commonly referred to as “The Veiled Nun.”  Until I got close enough to realize otherwise, it looks as if an actual veil is draped over the marble statute.  It’s absolutely breathtaking.  I immediately looked for the plaque that I assumed would identify who sculpted this masterpiece and it read, “Italian.”  How could this be?  How could no one know who crafted this masterful work?  So I thought I’d look into it when I returned home.  Turns out, the story behind “The Veiled Nun” is every bit as amazing as the piece itself.

Purchased in March 1863 in Rome by William Wilson Corcoran [1798-1888], it was gifted to the Corcoran Gallery of Art in 1873, and later acquired by the National Gallery of Art (2014).  Until recently, it was assumed that it was the work of Giuseppe Croff.  Experts have since concurred that it was actually created in a commercial workshop in Rome, making it unlikely we will ever know the name of the carver(s).  Here’s where it gets interesting, as Lisa Strong, then Manager of Curatorial Affairs at the Corcoran Gallery of Art, tells the story:

It is a little known fact that sculpture in this period was produced by a designer (the artist who signs the piece) and a craftsman who actually carved the piece in marble. The artist would have designed the sculpture in plaster or wax and then submitted that model to the workshop for production. Studio labor was specialized, so there would have been one craftsman to select and rough out the block of marble and to confirm there were no flaws in the stone. Next, another craftsman used a mechanism called a pointing device to drill into the block and match the contours of the plaster model. Yet another craftsman carved the face, followed by specialists in hair, eyes, etc. and a final artisan who polished the surface. This commercial production system was the same whether a workshop was producing a signed piece of sculpture under an artist’s supervision or a copy of an antique or eighteenth century design.

Strong goes on to say:

Once Corcoran returned to Washington, D.C. and put The Veiled Nun on display in his home, it received only an occasional mention from visitors. Likewise, its exhibition in the first Corcoran building (now the Renwick) in a niche of the rotunda, elicited little comment. This is perhaps because The Veiled Nun would have been a fairly familiar subject for Victorian audiences who were accustomed to virtuoso sculptural techniques. It was only in the early twentieth century, long after the taste for realistic sculpture had changed and the market for veiled busts had evaporated that the public began to take note. By 1969, when Readers Digest approached the Corcoran with a request for its audience’s favorite piece, The Veiled Nun was an easy answer. It was firmly entrenched as the one of Washington’s most beloved artworks and it remains among its most popular today.

As it should.  I’ll never forget the first moment I saw it or the story of how it was crafted.  It has raised the bar for me forever when it comes to what a group of peers, committed to a common goal, is capable of achieving.  The people who created “The Veiled Nun” didn’t just chase perfection, they caught it.  I share this story with you, so you can share it with your team.  Enjoy!  (Be sure to see it for yourself during your next visit to our nation’s capital).

Image: GW Corcoran School of the Arts

Peer Advantage at Expert DOJO

I started my day yesterday with a visit to Expert DOJO in Santa Monica, CA where I met with Brian Mac Mahon and Dustin Dye.   Brian is the head honcho and Dustin is the membership guru – yes, their real titles ;-).  Expert DOJO is what the website describes as  a “one-stop success factory” for entrepreneurs and leaders of early-stage companies.  It was actually my second visit to the dojo, which I found to be appropriately named, largely because of the palpable energy you feel as soon as you enter.  Very impressive.

The word dojo comes from the Japanese term “place of the way.”  It’s described in Richard Strozzi-Heckler’s book Holding the Center – Sanctuary in a Time of Confusion as: “A dojo is a space of commitment in which people practice together. What is powerful about the dojo is what it tells us of learning, and ultimately, of waking up, of being alive.”

The words commitment, learning, being alive, and discipline (my word) describe for me what makes Expert DOJO so effective and why so many people are so passionate about giving of themselves to benefit others in this environment.  Have a listen to Brian’s TEDx talk and you’ll understand why I know this to be true – why life doesn’t have to be a zero-sum game and, most especially, why who you surround yourself with matters both in business and in life.

Check out Expert DOJO’s website, and better yet, if you want to experience a brand of peer advantage you can only get in a dojo, come to their event on the morning of October 21st and discover your “place of the way.”  I look forward to seeing you!

 

Big Papi, Pedro, the Power of Peers & the Postseason!

I think a lot of Red Sox fans would agree that without the heroics of David Ortiz (Big Papi), the story going into this year’s postseason might have focused on the prospect of a match-up between the Boston Red Sox and the Chicago Cubs and which team might finally break their respective curse.  What fewer people may realize (outside of New England) is that if not for some heavy lobbying by Pedro Martinez after Ortiz was released by the Minnesota Twins at the end of the 2002 season, Ortiz not only wouldn’t have joined the Red Sox, but may have found it difficult to get a job with any team in major league baseball at that time.

In a piece by ESPN last month, Ortiz and his agent described the situation this way:

ORTIZ: So now you see all these guys signing, and I’ve got nothing. I didn’t think I wasn’t going to play, but I was preparing to just go to winter ball and hope something came up. So I went to winter ball and had a good winter, but I didn’t have anything.

FERNANDO CUZA, AGENT TO DAVID ORTIZ: David was calling me five times a day. He was nervous as s—. I’ll never forget being in that coffee shop with him at the Sheraton in Santo Domingo [capital of the Dominican Republic]. That face.

Every day that went by, you could see it. He was saying, “I’m young. I have no other skills but to play baseball, but nobody wants me. What am I going to do? How am I going to provide for my family?” I told him if you get the chance, you’re gonna be a son of a bitch. You’re gonna tear it up. I didn’t think his career was over, because he was a great hitter.

DESPITE HIS AGENT’S words, Ortiz was in a full panic by January. Spring training was six weeks away, and he had no job. There were no offers, no workouts, no invites. The Red Sox now had Jeremy Giambi, Zuleta and Hillenbrand on the roster. Then came an intervention from an unlikely source — perhaps the greatest Sox pitcher of all time.

A Boston Globe article last week provided then Red Sox President Larry Lucchino’s account of the call from Pedro:

“[Martinez] called me after the Twins cut David and said, ‘I’m not calling about my contract. I just want to call you directly and make a suggestion.’ I said, ‘Yeah, go.’ He said, ‘David Ortiz is out there. He just got released. It baffles me as to why he was released. But he’s really a good guy, No. 1, and he can really hit, No. 2, so it would mean a lot if you can give him a chance to make the Red Sox.’

“It was that call that set in motion the events that led us to signing David Ortiz.”

When the Twins cut Ortiz, his agent, Fern Cuza, sent faxes to every team informing them of Ortiz’s availability. No team showed meaningful initial interest. Ortiz believes Martinez changed that.

When the Red Sox organization and its fans paid tribute to Big Papi on the final day of the regular season at Fenway Park, Ortiz publicly thanked Pedro Martinez for being the guy he credits for making it all possible.  If the power of peers could rid Boston of the Curse of the Bambino, then imagine how it could impact your life.

As we prepare for the Year of the Peer, here are two things you can do today that will have an immediate impact on your life and the life of someone else:  1) Think of a peer that helped you at some point in your life.  Call, email, text, create a video or pen a handwritten note and thank them!  You’ll make their day and you’ll feel pretty good, too! 2) Think of a peer who could either benefit from your encouragement or expertise (or both) and let them know that whatever it is they are trying to achieve in life, that you are in their corner.  Show them you believe in them and if you think you can help by making a “Pedro-call,” don’t ask, just do it.

Simple acts.  Big impact.  The power of peers.  Go Red Sox!

 

Collaboration Trumps Competition

When I thought about a headline before writing this post, the first thing that popped into my head was what you see here, “Collaboration Trumps Competition.”  I didn’t connect it to the presidential election at first and yet it’s fitting. So here we go.  Regardless of whether you’re a Trump or Clinton supporter, the tenor of the campaign itself has sunk to new depths.  Yet when it’s all over, we’ll be reading about the importance of healing and uniting the country.  Ironically, the same media that fueled the fire and aggravated the wounds will start handing out medical supplies.

The problem is this:  The deeper the wound, the longer it takes to heal – the more likely it will leave a scar. The lower we go, the tougher it is to climb out of the hole.  The harder is it to trust one another again.  The tougher it is to make the transition from fighting against each other to fighting for one another.  Regardless of who prevails in the election, we may be headed for one of the toughest recovery periods since the Civil War.

At present, we’re a nation suffering from boiling frog syndrome.  Consider this, in 1948 Harry Truman campaigned against what was dubbed the “Do Nothing Congress” – a body that eventually passed 906 bills.  Compare that to the 112th Congress (283), the 113th (296), and the current collection of legislators (228), with just a few months to go before the clock runs out.  Acrimony has bred distrust and revealed the worst of partisan politics.  Now, it’s become acceptable to get elected to Congress and come back virtually empty handed every two years as long as you hold true to your hard and fast positions.  It happened without most of us realizing how dangerously hot the water has become.

Something has got to change – fast!  2017 should be the start of asking our legislators (and leaders at all levels from every branch of government) to work and play well with others, so we can move our country forward instead of staying mired in the kind of gridlock that holds a country hostage.  To be fair, however, we all have a role to play in making this possible.  As I pointed out in my last post about the Connections exhibit at the Smithsonian’s Renwick Gallery, everything is connected.  We not only have to ask more of our political leaders, we have to ask for better behavior by media and business leaders as well.  That starts with us.

If the media cared more about their viewers than beating their competitors, then maybe (just maybe), they would stop covering wackos setting their hair on fire and start celebrating meaningful collaboration and compromise.   Today, collaboration breeds political casualties  – winners and losers, leaders who “caved to the other side.” As long as everything remains a zero-sum game and those who put the country first continue to be vilified by the press, we’ll all be the biggest loser.  Compromise is not a four-letter word. We have the power to send a message to our media and change the climate so that our elected officials can get back to the business of governing.

Speaking of business, effective collaboration requires trust, and business leaders could set a better example.  The recent Wells Fargo scandal is just one among the latest breaches of the public trust in industries ranging from finance to pharmaceutical to automotive, etc.   Companies who respect their customers and hold true to their values (all the time) are companies worth supporting.

I wrote a piece recently specific to business leaders at Shaping the Odds titled Five Reasons 2017 Will Be the Year of the Peer.  Reason #6 is we have no choice. As trust among institutions of all kinds remains low, we’ll have to rely on one another more than ever if we’re going to turn the tide.  Alone, fighting the current seems impossible.  Together, however, we are powerful beyond measure.  Collaboration trumps competition any day of the week.   Since we’re all in the same boat, it’s time to start rowing together and prepare for the Year of the Peer!

*Image from wealthmanagement.com